Friends, in twelve days I am celebrating a birthday.

I am going to be quite old, let me tell you. Quite old, indeed.

And while I have little desire to add more stuff to my life, if you, for some reason, are sitting at home and saying “Gosh, I sure want to send Jessica a present for her birthday, but I just don’t know WHAT!”, well here is an extremely short list of things that I would like.

This print by one of my favorite illustrators, Sophie Blackall. I saw another one of these long posters on the subway in NYC, and I about flipped when I heard that Blackall had one. Want!

My running shoes have a big chunk missing from the inside heel – every time I take off my shoe, bits of foam fly everywhere. Also, they smell kinda awful! I need a new pair. Plus, I read/was indoctrinated by Born to Run, so I’m now convinced that my extra-padded shoes are giving me injuries every time I run. So maybe a minimally padded number, like these fancy New Balance Minimus? Anyone?

Ever since I beat Twilight Princess, there’s been a small hole in my heart. Not that I have any time for video games…… but I want to have time for video games…. If you are reading this and want to beat it and then mail it to me *cough* DOROTHY! *cough*, then this would count as a birthday present.

I think if I had all those things, my life would be complete.

Unless anyone has a fulltime job + benefits laying around they’d like to offer, that is…